Q: Desire is gone, and I move through the days almost like a robot, with no agenda and lacking much action. Foods and activities come and go in an instant. I never know what I’ll be doing next. Passion is dormant. It’s hard to like anyone especially and hard to decide what to eat or buy, yet it’s easy to take whatever or hang out with whomever. I’m alone and enjoying it, and I don’t miss relationship, but I do miss someone around to talk and do things with. Any pointers?
A: What you describe is very common when desire falls away. There can be a kind of dry emptiness when the usual sources of passion no longer move you. Sometimes this happens after an opening or awakening; however, the dryness suggests that there’s still a habit of living in the mind. There’s nothing wrong with this, but when emptiness is tasted by the mind, it is very empty.
One suggestion is to drop into the Heart and experience the emptiness from there. This can bring back a sense of moistness and even passion without returning to the egoic types of desire and passion. When emptiness is tasted by the Heart, emptiness is experienced as very full.
As for the question of relationships, I suggest dropping into the Heart and simply relating to whatever is present right now. You can be filled with love by loving the floor, the furniture, the sounds in the room, and anything else that is present, including, of course, other people. It is the mind’s habit to look around and see that there is no one to talk to. The mind is conditioned to notice what appears to be lacking. In contrast, the Heart notices the endless possibilities for relationship. You can even fall in love with empty space! And if no one else is around, why not talk to your true love? Why not talk to the emptiness itself?